When I was a kid, the craze was friendship bracelets. You would get the different-colored strands, and braid them in the perfect individualized color scheme for your friends. Everyone wore them. You achieved status by having friends who could do intricate braids, and by wearing several on each arm or ankle. Today, it is silly bands–plastic bracelets that snap back into the shape of an animal or character when you take them off. At one point, Anna Kathryn had forty-two of them. On one arm.

Her first silly band came to her from “Aiden’s big sister” in the carpool pick-up line at school. After receiving one at a birthday party as a favor, and a bunch more as prizes for Laps for TAPS, a school fundraiser, she began to ask me to get her more. “Sure,” I said. “I will look for some that you can share with your friends.” “Oh,” she replied. “You need to get me a lot, then. I want to keep a whole bunch of them!” She was five, and I considered this a perfect training op. We agreed that silly bands were for sharing, but that we would make sure she had plenty. Honestly, why not use such an inexpensive tool to teach my child how much fun sharing can be?

Slight problem, though. Where does one find silly bands? I went to the Dollar Tree–always a first resort when it comes to trend items that may break or get lost and must come cheaply. Sorry! The Dollar Tree can not afford to sell these magical plastic bracelets for $1 a bag. Somebody suggested a shoe store. I have no idea why a shoe store would carry these. Jibbits, sure (the decorative buttons you can buy for the holes in Croc shoes), but silly bands?

My daughter jumped into the car after school asking for her new silly bands five days out of a five-day schoolweek, so finding them was becoming a pressing need for my sanity. Eschewing shoe stores for a place that makes sense, I went to Claire’s, the jewelry-slash-cheap-tween-swag store at the mall. The perky sale’s associate with the black funky pigtails smiled at me. I wasn’t sure if she was sympathetic or condescending, but sadly, silly bands were sold out. (Probably five minutes after being restocked, the way this trend is growing.) I could try the shoe store up the escalator and to the right, she said. And so I did, feeling like ten times a fool, because–again–WHY are shoe stores selling these? Sure enough, though, hanging behind the counter where sticky junior fingers can’t reach them, were silly bands. Farm Animal ones. All the other characters were sold out, I was told apologetically. Oh, except for the glow-in-the-dark bands that cost more. Seriously? These small matters do not concern me. My kindergartener asks for a computer for her birthday, and a grown-up camera for Christmas. If she’s going to beg me for something that other KIDS love to play with, let’s not quibble over price. I handed over my money, and was handed a bag of each kind in return.

Friends and loved ones, trends like these are gold to a parent. At the playground, my now-six-year-old made friends with three children. When she came back to the blanket where I sat sipping my travel cup of coffee and watching the twins on their bikes, she not only had different bands than before, she had less. My mommy’s heart swelled to learn that she had traded with her friends. And then because they loved hers so much, she gave a few more away just for fun. She was not sad to have fewer silly bands; rather, her eyes roved the playground looking for more like-minded friends. And so for a few cents each, my daughter is learning what it feels like to give away what is hers without expectation of anything in return. Just for the joy of giving.

Silly bands are also great for discipline. We all know that consistency is key to proper discipline, but even within consistency, it helps to shake the consequences up a bit to keep things fresh. John and I have been looking for ways to teach our children to mind using consequences that really motivate our kids to obey without reminders the next time. We use their personal learning styles to tweak our system. I’ll be writing a blog one of these days about how this process helped us with potty training the twins (seriously, it’s only fun looking back), but I had an epiphany this week when I realized I could use silly bands to help me with Anna Kathryn. One thing about my kids that drives me bonkers is their mob mentality. If one does it, they all do it, because there is strength in numbers. (Or more accurately, I might not have the strength to discipline all three at once.) With the weather turning fine, they’ve been playing outside in the afternoons after school. One rule John has given them is that they are not to play with the water hose. Of course, the one thing in our backyard that is off limits is the most attractive. I found them all out there dripping wet for the second day in a row, and after stripping them down and giving them baths to wash off the mud, I took the silly bands off Anna Kathryn’s wrist. “This is your discipline,” I told her. “You have to earn these back with positive behavior.” Folks, I won’t go into the heartbreaking tears, or all the specifics of what I’ve required of her. However, let me just say that I’ve been trying to teach Anna Kathryn how to properly make her bed for six months. For the past three days, that bed has been properly made before she’s even come out of her room for breakfast. With eagerness and pride. And she is wearing three silly bands.

I love these things. I am going to have to keep some on hand for all the summer jobs I hope to get my kids to accomplish for me!